Premier League Prime Minister

So with just weeks to go until the general election in the UK I am continuing Severn Sports’s election/football fusion called footolitics! After my blog last week, where I compared the top eight in the English Premier league to eight political parties all looking for glory this May, I have decided to get the rest of the team involved in this one. I asked Ryan, Kelsey and Penno over the weekend who they thought would be the best man to be Prime Minister out of the 20 current Premier League managers.

Arsene? Van Gaal? Jose? Top leaders in their field, if you pardon the pun, but could they be great leaders of the country? Myself and the Severn Sport team give you the answer, which is no as we didn’t pick any of those.

 

First I’m starting off with the big man, Ryan Butler. You’re probably expecting Louis Van Gaal from this Manchester United fanatic. He has gone with Sam Allardyce. Why oh why did Butler choose the roundest manager in the Premier League. Is it because he won’t have far to move as he already lives in London? No, its because no matter how awful it is to watch he always get his teams winning. He gets results without it looking good. Plus he looks hard as nails so Putin would be scared and im sure once the big Sam magic is turned on Merkel will bow down to such a manly man. The political party Big Sam would theoretically be leader of is Labour as he is a man of the people, and after his work at Bolton he is liked up north.

Sorry back-bencher, speak up...
Sorry back-bencher, speak up…

 

 

Next to decide is Mr Kelsey DeMaria. You’re probably expecting a hipster kind of answer from Kels, who prefers his non-league football over the Premier League, but his choice surprised me as this man didn’t even come in to my mind when I first plucked this question out of the air. I’m just going to come out and say it then explain why Kelsey chose this man… Tim Sherwood In my not so humble opinion, Tim Sherwood would be the best prime minister hands down. He is arguably the best English manager out there at the moment thanks to his no nonsense managerial style and you can guarantee this would translate to his ability to run the country. If he was sitting down with President Hollande of France and he was giving Tim grief, our man wouldn’t take it. He’d throw his gilet to the floor and start scrapping with him, then when all’s said and done he’d walk out, stopping only at the doorway to turn round and say to the stricken French leader: “Have that, you slaaaag.” The right Honorable Mr Sherwood would be leader of The English Democrats because he is English and proud and looks like the kinda nutty geezer who loves a tear up on the terraces of the House of Commons.

The Gilet Is Already Off...
The Gilet Is Already Off…

 

 

Penno actually got back to me on this question, yes Matt Penalty Bowman is getting involved in a group task! He has chosen the man with the cap, the long throw favorer, the long ball specialist, the relegation avoider, etc… etc… Yes that’s correct, Tony Pulis. A great leader who has a track record of taking cash strapped teams and exceeding expectations. In this time of austerity Pulis could balance the books and make Britain an average nation again! If he gets any crap from other countries he’ll brush it off. Mr Pulis also has his Campaign slogan sorted: Pulis: making purses out of pigs ears for generations to come. Its been a few years since we’ve had a Tony at the helm of British Politics. He would be party leader of the Liberal Democrat because he’s always mid table.

Its Time For Change... Its Time For Pulis...
Its Time For Change… Its Time For Pulis…

 

 

Finally it’s my turn and i’m going with a new man to the Premier League, Southampton boss, Ronald Koeman. Strange choice? I have my reasons! Firstly he is new the the Premier League as stated so a bit of fresh blood in the country is good. I chose him though because he has been successful despite set backs, he spends wisely and can replaced previously sold big assets, he has also made a relatively small club to a top 8 Premier League club. He will be a good man to solve the deficit problem faced by any PM as he is good as replacing expensive quality with inexpensive quality, maybe he could sell Big Ben and replace it with a sundial. I say Big Ben because losing big assets doesn’t phase the legendary Ron. He would take the UK back to the top of the worlds elite countries with a bamboozling, steady performance, stunning the bigger countries of the world and making them look at Britain as it passes them. Also he has amazing hair… that’s a big plus if he wants to gain votes. He would be party leader for the Liberal Democrats. Being a passionate Dutchman he can only support the bright oranges!

Run the country? Yeh i'll give it a go...
Run the country? Yeh i’ll give it a go…

 

 

So there we have it, some unexpected choices but good ones none the less, you could say they seem better than the crop of ladies & gents wanting our votes to get in to number 10 in May. What do you think? let us know which manager you think would be the best Prime Minister, tweet us @SevernSport.
More Football/Politics coming soon to Severn Sport.

 

Matt Yates
@Myatesey
matt.yates@Severnsport.co.uk